Mike Tyson will replace McGriff the Crime Dog in the television ad campaign to "Take a Bite out of Crime". In a stunning development that is being lauded by one of the political parties and denounced by the other, it is rumored that once each week Tyson will bite the ear off of a high profile villain. Starting the first week with himself and proceeding onward through the likes of the Unabomber, Tim McVeigh, OJ Simpson the event will culminate in a no-holds-barred cage match between Tyson and Lorena Bobbit. Quotes Bobbit, "someone's going down, and it ain't me." -- Weekly Reader